- "It's gonna hurt a lot, but you'll be better! You'll see! Ha Ha HA HA!"
- — Anonymous Mad Dok
An Ork Painboy, also known as a Mad Dok, is a member of a special class of Ork Oddboy who are responsible for fixing injuries even the highly regenerative Ork physiology cannot repair, such as severed limbs and brain damage. They use "Stabby Bits" as their medical tools. An Ork will only go to a Painboy when he has no other choice, as these Oddboyz are infamous for trying out experimental procedures (such as the greatly feared Squig brain transplant) on patients while they are under anesthesia (known as a "concussion" to other intelligent races). Painboyz are responsible for attaching crude bionics to Ork patients that have been created by the Mekboyz, although sometimes they are not paying attention and replace the wrong part of the patient's body. This is often distressing to a patient who is the lucky recipient of an exploding leg, especially if it was his arm that needed attention. High-ranking Painboyz are called Painbosses and are known to be accompanied by Cybork bodyguards. Orks are surprisingly resilient and have had arms, legs and even heads swapped around and the Ork in question has survived to tell the tale!
Orks as a race are extremely tough and resilient; the only sure way to definitively kill one is decapitation. Many an unfortunate opponent has had the nasty surprise of seeing the Ork they had just disembowled keep fighting barely hampered by the terrible wound. The Greenskins' resilience and regenerative capacities have their limits however, hence the "Brain Boyz" (as their creators are known to the Orks) saw fit to provide the Orks with medical specialists with a genetically encoded knowledge of and passion for the inner workings of the Orkoid body.
Such Orks often call themselves "Medikorks" or "Medboyz", but to most Orks they are known as Painboyz, Butcherz or Mad Doks. Instead of serving as a comforting presence like the medics of other intelligent races, Painboyz are avoided at all costs by their fellow Orks. This is because all Painboyz are extremely enthusiastic about their role, but possess only a rudimentary knowledge of their craft, and no consideration whatsover for their patient's (victim's) comfort. Treatment by a Painboy is a traumatic experience even for the hardiest of Orks. The best a patient can hope for before the Dok starts working is the Greenskin variant of anesthesia (a severe concussion induced by a good wallop on the head with a stout mallet!). Painboyz are very enthusiastic about their job, and never hesitate to open up a body part and start poking around within it, "just to check if everything works", even if said body part is not wounded. If all goes well, the Painboy will not get too distracted by his investigations and will eventually get to repairing the damaged body part, but it is not uncommon for an Ork to requiring treatment for a wounded leg to wake up with a replacement bionic arm, because the Mad Dok found that his arm also was not working correctly. And even that is not much compared to the consequences of the Mad Dok getting a truly "revolutionary" idea, and attempting an experimental procedure on his patient, such as the the greatly feared Squig brain transplant. Orks are surprisingly resilient and have had arms, legs and even heads swapped around and the Ork in question has survived to tell the tale, but all of these potentially fatal outcomes means that an Ork will only go to a Painboy when he has no other choices remaining.
Painboyz are also responsible for attaching Bioniks to Ork patients, and as such closely collaborate with the Mekboyz who create those crude contraptions. They also have a hand in outfitting Orks with Karapaces and Mega-Armour and in the creation of Deff Dreads.
All Painboyz carry an enormous assortment of saws, knives, cutters, pincers and other tools they use to poke around in their fellow's bodies, which are collectively referred to as the "Stabby Bitz", and double as quite efficient close quarter melee weapons. Many Doks also carry an 'Urty Syringe, which is a huge syringe they use to inject some "medical" liquid into their victims, and also double up as a potent poisonous close quarter weapon. Also, some Painboyz brew Fighting Juice, an horrible concotion of combat stimulants and narcotics that can keep even a badly wounded Ork in the fight. Painboyz are quite often assisted by Gretchin assistants, who carry part of the Mad Dok's gear, and do their best to assist the Ork at his craft. Very enthusiastic, but catastrophically inept, these Gretchin assistants as often make things worse for the patient as they actually provide aid. Highly succesful Painboyz, referred to by their fellows as Painbosses, are known to be accompanied by a coterie of Cybork bodyguards they usually have created themselves.
Famous Mad DoksEdit
- Grotsnik - Grotsnik saved Warlord Ghazghkull Mag Uruk Thraka's life when he was hit in the head by a Bolter shell and became his personal physician. Grotsnik is one of the most infamous of Mad Doks, and the first to attempt the Squig brain transplant.
- Codex: Orks (4th Edition), pp. 38, 43
- Gorkamorka Rulebook (Specialist Game)