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"It's gonna hurt a lot, but you'll be better! You'll see! Ha Ha HA HA!"
— Anonymous Mad Dok
PainboySurgery

An Ork Painboy performing surgery with the aid of his Grot "assistants."

An Ork Painboy, also known as a Mad Dok or just a Dok, is a member of a special class of Ork Oddboyz who are responsible for fixing injuries even the highly regenerative Ork physiology cannot repair, such as severed limbs and brain damage. They use "Stabby Bits" as their medical tools.

An Ork will only go to a Painboy when he has no other choice, as these Oddboyz are infamous for trying out experimental procedures (such as the greatly feared Squig brain transplant) on patients while they are under anesthesia (known as a "concussion" to other intelligent races).

Painboyz are responsible for attaching crude bionics called "bioniks" to Ork patients that have been created by the Mekboyz, although sometimes they are not paying attention and replace the wrong part of the patient's body. This is often distressing to a patient who is the lucky recipient of an exploding leg, especially if it was his arm that needed attention.

Yet Orks are surprisingly resilient and have had arms, legs and even heads swapped around and the Ork in question has survived to tell the tale!

High-ranking Painboyz are called "Painbosses" and are known to be accompanied by Cybork bodyguards they usually have created themselves.

RoleEdit

"Not dat one! Da uvver arm! ARGH!"
— Snagruk, Ork Patient
Meboy 7th Ed

Kutrag, Bad Moons Ork Painboy or "Mad Dok"; leering with evil intent, he is trying to decide which of his wicked surgical implements to stick his victims with first.

Orks as a race are extremely tough and resilient; the only sure way to definitively kill one is decapitation. Many an unfortunate opponent has had the nasty surprise of seeing the Ork they had just disembowled keep fighting barely hampered by the terrible wound. The Greenskins' resilience and regenerative capacities have their limits however, hence the "Brain Boyz" (as their creators are known to the Orks) saw fit to provide the Orks with medical specialists with a genetically encoded knowledge of and passion for the inner workings of the Orkoid body.

Such Orks often call themselves "Medikorks" or "Medboyz", but to most Orks they are known as "Painboyz," "Butcherz" or "Mad Doks." Instead of serving as a comforting presence like the medics of other intelligent species, Painboyz are avoided at all costs by their fellow Orks. This is because all Painboyz are extremely enthusiastic about their role, but possess only a rudimentary knowledge of their craft, and no consideration whatsover for their patient's (victim's) comfort.

The chief passions of Painboyz are surgery and extreme dentistry. The latter is often carried out during the former, as the extracted teef pay for the exorbitant fees levelled at "da kustomer." Whilst the patient is safely strapped down, mouth wedged open and internal organs exposed, he is not really in a position to argue.

Painboyz learn their craft through a mixture of instinct, trial and error, and the time-honoured principles of "Orky know-wotz." Their greatest joy in life is "eksperimentin," a mindset that creates a lot of common ground with Meks. Indeed, in many ways Painboyz are the Meks of the Greenskin physique, in that they repair, maintain -- and even improve upon -- the Ork body itself.

Woe betide those who seek treatment from a Painboy with spare time on his blood-slick hands; an Ork suffering from a nasty case of severed limb may riskemploying a Dok to graft on a replacement, and end up with one of the local Mek's "cuttin' edge" inventions. This can be distressing for the owner of, for instance, a Rutgot Mark II Exploding Leg, especially if it was his arm that needed the attention.

Indeed, Painboyz truly relish the implantation of the "bioniks" produced by Meks, and the professions occasionally work together to create Cyborks. These are unstable fusions of Greenskin and machine, and range from Orks who have had damaged limbs replaced with whirring blades or tracks, to fully bionik Boyz who are more mechanism than Ork. Doks also have a hand in outfitting Orks with Karapaces and Mega Armour and in the creation of Deff Dreads.

Treatment by a Painboy is a traumatic experience even for the hardiest of Orks. The best a patient can hope for before the Dok starts working is the Greenskin variant of anesthesia (a severe concussion induced by a good wallop on the head with a stout mallet!). Painboyz are very enthusiastic about their job, and never hesitate to open up a body part and start poking around within it, "just to check if everything works", even if said body part is not wounded.

If all goes well, the Painboy will not get too distracted by his investigations and will eventually get to repairing the damaged body part, but it is not uncommon for an Ork to requiring treatment for a wounded leg to wake up with a replacement bionic arm, because the Mad Dok found that his arm also was not working correctly. And even that is not much compared to the consequences of the Mad Dok getting a truly "revolutionary" idea, and attempting an experimental procedure on his patient, such as the the greatly feared Squig brain transplant. All of these potentially fatal outcomes means that an Ork will only go to a Painboy when he has no other choices remaining.

When his tribe is caught up in a WAAAGH!, the battle raging and the wounded lying thick on the ground, a Painboy really comes into his own. This is a truly happy time for Doks. Never do they have a better opportunity to hone their skills, patching up the Orks in their care and giving them a quick shot from a rusty syringe to get them back into the fray. Needless to say, times of war are extremely lucrative for Painboyz; many only follow the richest Orks in battle, hoping their charges become grievously wounded enough to require their services.

Of course, Painboyz in battle are not about to let the rest of the ladz have all the fun, and will cheerfully pile into the scrum of hand-to-hand combat. There they apply their anatomical knowledge, along with an array of surgical saws and blood-encrusted scalpels, to the task of vigorously dismembering the foe. Motorised separators are thrust into open wounds, tearing them wide and allowing the leering Painboyz to harvest choice "squishy bits" from within their screaming victims.

Fungal serums surge through the veins of luckless enemies until their blood congeals with spores. Clanking, syringe-festooned Power Klaws creak open and shut as the Painboyz fix their beady eyes upon hapless foes, knowing that soon enough their pneumatic blades will be slicing through flesh, bone and tendon.

Grot orderlies descend upon the wounded, beady eyes and skinning tools glinting as they set to work. Anyone who has seen a Painboy wade through the enemy ranks and leave red ruin in his wake knows that Ork surgeons have little understanding of -- and even less interest in -- the notion of the sanctity of life.

These practitioners of indiscriminate surgery are never quite right in the head. They do not use anaesthetic, preferring to know that their patient is still alive and kicking. Painboyz burrow enthusiastically into their customers using oversized surgical implements; the sadistic glee with which they do so is particularly off-putting, especially for the patient. Still, such is the usefulness of the Painboy that such eccentricities are often overlooked, especially if the Warboss is the proud owner of a shiny new bionik limb.

Bad DoksEdit

The eccentricity of the Painboy is as nothing compared to that of a Bad Dok. These Orks are outcasts from their tribes, and are most often found practising their dubious arts within Freebooter warbands. Amongst such company, no questions are asked and a Bad Dok's past is his own business. Besides, Freebooterz are just mean and desperate enough to accept the surgical aid of any Oddboy who offers it, even if the risks are considerable.

Bad Doks intentionally practise deranged and disturbing surgeries upon their prey. Their patients can find themselves in possession of a set of mechanical lungs, sporting an extra head or limb, or even become victims of the aforementioned horror known as the Squig brain transplant. Though Bad Doks never ask for payment, the price of seeking them out is nevertheless high.

WargearEdit

All Painboyz carry an enormous assortment of saws, knives, cutters, pincers and other tools they use to poke around in their fellow's bodies, which are collectively referred to as the "Stabby Bitz", and double as quite efficient close quarter melee weapons. Many Doks also carry an 'Urty Syringe, which is a huge syringe they use to inject some "medical" liquid into their victims, and also double up as a potent poisonous close quarter weapon.

Also, some Painboyz brew Fighting Juice, a horrible concotion of combat stimulants and narcotics that can keep even a badly wounded Ork in the fight. Painboyz are quite often assisted by Gretchin assistants, who carry part of the Mad Dok's gear, and do their best to assist the Ork at his craft. Very enthusiastic, but catastrophically inept, these Gretchin assistants as often make things worse for the patient as they actually provide aid. The average Painboy is outfitted with:


Notable PainboyzEdit

Mad Doc Grotsnik

A sketch of Mad Dok Grotsnik

  • Grotsnik - Grotsnik, also known as Mad Dok Grotsnik, was a typical Ork Painboy of the Deathskulls klan, obsessed with the performance of "surjery" and rooting around in other people's heads to see what he could find -- or alter. Mad Dok Grotsnik is an absolute terror, the most bloodthirsty and deranged of an unhinged breed. Once a Painboy of some skill, Grotsnik is now all but berserk with the desire to do harm to others. He rose to prominence when he became the personal Dok of the future Ork Warlord Ghazghkull Thraka and Ghazghkull gave him credit for opening up his mind to the messages of the Ork Gods Gork and Mork that subsequently led Ghazghkull to lead the two greatest Ork WAAAGH!s in recent history during the Second and Third Wars for Armageddon.
  • Painboy Fourklaw - A notorious Ork Painboy who possessed cybernetic limbs, Fourklaw served in Warlord Grukk Face-rippa's Red WAAAGH! that ravaged the Sanctus Reach sub-sector in the late 41st Millennium. He was known to be the best mate of the notorious Big Mek Mogrok.
  • Painboy Kutrag - An Ork Painboy who serves Gashrakk, the Warboss of the Split-Grin Bad Moons klan. As the richest Ork of the wealthiest tribe in the Sanctus Reach Sub-sector, Gashrakk is the only Ork who can afford Kutrag's ridiculous rates, keeping the Painboy supplied with teef so he will fix up the Split-Grin Boyz. Often, "fixing" an Ork means making him better in some new and unusual way; Kutrag has a reputation for hacking off perfectly good limbs so he can replace them with something better.

SourcesEdit

  • Codex: Orks (8th Edition), pp. 36, 93
  • Codex: Orks (7th Edition), pp. 15, 24-25, 74, 76-77, 102, 127-130
  • Codex: Orks (4th Edition), pp. 38, 43, 59
  • Codex: Orks (3rd Edition), pp. 9, 42
  • Codex: Orks (2nd Edition), pg. 24, 65
  • Red WAAAGH! Campaign Supplement (7th Edition), pg. 69
  • Rogue Trader: Koronus Bestiary (RPG), pg. 75
  • WAAAGH! Ghazghkull: A Codex Ork Supplement (7th Edition), pg. 7
  • Gorkamorka: Da Uvver Book (Specialist Game), pp. 78-79

GalleryEdit