Warhammer 40K Commandments

Adeptus Mechanicus Funny 6
  • 1. Thou shalt not refer to the Adepta Soritas as "Bolter Bitches."
  • 2. Orks are not "cute."
  • 3. Thou shalt not make jokes about the Imperial Guard's weapons.
  • 4. Thou shalt not replace the Librarian's staff with a magic wand.
  • 5. Thou shalt not tip the Terminators over during battle.
  • 6. Thou shalt not do Spock impersonations around Eldar.
  • 7. C-3P0 is not a Necron ambassador.
  • 8. Thou shalt not pay someone an Imperial to eat that Squig.
  • 9. No, you cannot "Take the Titan for a spin."
  • 10. Thou shalt not use thy multi-meltas to light campfires. (in a similar manner, thou shalt not use the Terminator Captain's chainfist to open tins of baked beans)
  • 11. Thou shalt not bribe the Inquisitor to bring down Exterminatus on your ex-wife.
  • 12. Thou shalt not refer to the Rhino transports as "pimp wagons," nor shalt thou use the phrase, "If the Rhino be rockin, don't come a knockin."
  • 13. The Chapter Master is not a "drag."
  • 14. Thou shall not use Power Swords to cut your food.
  • 15. Thou shall not ask a Sister if you might, "Donate some of your own Gene-Seed."
  • 16. Thou shall not throw soap at nurglings.
  • 17. Thou shalt not put a "kick me" sign on the Golden Throne.
  • 18. Thou shalt not refer to the Machine Spirit as "Cruise Control".
  • 19. Thou shalt not stick a 'Honk if you think I'm sexy' sticker on the Sisters' Rhino.
  • 20. Thou shalt not honk if thou sees a sticker saying 'Honk if you think I'm sexy' on a Sister's Rhino.
  • 21. Thou shalt not unplug the Golden Throne just "for laughs".
  • 22. Thou shalt not make the Emperor read your palms, or call upon him as "Miss Cleo".

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